You don’t ask for much, right? You just want people around you to do their jobs, do them correctly, and not be morons, right?

Yeah. Well, good luck. Here are six of the best things that drive you nuts about your co-workers.

6. They don’t turn things off. Did you watch television in the break room? Turn it off. Did you finish using the toaster? Turn it off. Is your phone playing music while you work? Turn it off. You’re distracting everyone arround you.

5. They don’t use headphones. I used to have a cubicle-mate who listened to jazz music without headphones. I like jazz, but it’s not conducive to getting work done. Not for everyone. And, beyond that, how many times do you have to hear the “awesomest YouTube video ever” played at full volume?


4. They talk too loudly. Moderate your volume. Don’t talk so loud. Don’t laugh so loud. If it happens occasionally, fine, but you need to keep it down so everyone else can get some shit done around here.

3. They don’t proofread. Seriously. You are getting paid a good salary to do this job. Have a little pride in your work and spell-check. Do you realize how stupid we all look when you can’t spell “vandalized” or put a space between “in” and “front”?


2. They can’t calm the fuck down. When something urgent comes up, you don’t have to yell, jump up and down, call in the cavalry, shout across the room, or combine any of them. Just deal with the problem in a calm, quiet manner.

1. They can’t quit bitching. Work sucks. Everyone knows work sucks. It sucks to work wherever you’re working; it sucks to hang around there too. Your job sucks. But it’s still a job, and you have to do it, and you should be thankful that you have one. Don’t complain in the middle of the room. Take your negativity away from me.


BONUS CONTENT! Comic Sans. Don’t use it.

Got an idea for a future Six of the Best? Tweet it to me @listener42 and maybe I’ll see it, ignore it, remember it a few months later, and forget to thank you for the suggestion.