A Clockwork Orange Cranberry BBQ Sauce

A few Black Fridays back I found myself being awakened by an early morning incessant knocking at the door. It was a longtime friend and fellow Black Friday widower, left sans female by the pre-dawn siren song of Retail America.

Bad news is that this interloper awakened me before the crack of noon, which is a cardinal sin in my neighborhood.

Good news is that this interloper awakened me before the crack of noon, bearing three previously roasted turkey breasts which had been pinched from his girlfriend’s residence the night before.

Far be it from me to not take full advantage of the culinary equivalent of Han Solo’s jettisoned, smuggled cargo, so I rubbed the sleepies out of my eyes and answered the door.

A much-needed shower and shave later, I stumble downstairs to find said interloping friend cruising through my embarrassingly large DVD collection. After a few minutes he plucks out an old nerd fave, Stanley Kubrick’s A Clockwork Orange.

Although my boy has crap timing, he has excellent taste in nerd cinema.

About a half hour in, the post-Thanksgiving hunger was upon us, and we turned to the turkey breasts.

And yawned.

They were just sitting there in their tin foil blanket, somewhat chilled and just waiting to be appropriately used.

What to do?

Slice and serve after microwaving?

Add insult to injury by re-roasting an already over-cooked turkey breast?

Just go all Zombie Neanderthal and start chewing?

No. Not at all.

Where others see leftovers…I see opportunity.

And sandwiches.

More specifically, a post-Thanksgiving pulled pork-like sammich with an awesome sauce, preferably BBQish in nature.

So I haul my considerable bulk off of my Jabba throne-like chair-and-a-half and shuffle into the kitchen to see what we had.

Short answer: as usual, not a lot.

Usual fridge door offerings of ketchup, sriracha, dijon mustard, Worchestershire sauce, apple cider vinegar, and a can of ginger ale.

Freezer door had a sad, lonely can of frozen orange juice concentrate.

Something in my reptile brain stirs, and as I turn to look on the kitchen counter I see two cans of unused jellied cranberry sauce.

And an idea becomes a recipe just like that.

I grab 2 quart pot and place it over medium high heat.

Into said pot I drop all of the above plus a few dry spices and bring to a burble (gentle boil).

Then I drop the heat and allow to simmer until our holiday dose of ultra-violence has wrapped (about 90 minutes, stirring occasionally during lengthy exposition).

Shred the turkey breasts with a pair of metal serving forks (while the movie plays and the sauce is being born) until they resemble “pulled” pork, and then drop the whole mess into the pot of BBQesque goodness to warm through.

Serve on any sort of crusty bread/roll finishes this and does it justice, especially when washed down by several Yuengling Black and Tans.

You’ll thank me later, and love when a plan comes together…

A Clockwork Orange Cranberry BBQ Sauce

Print recipe

Ingredients

2 cans jellied cranberry sauce
1 can ginger ale
1 can frozen orange juice concentrate
1/4 cup sriracha
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
1/4 cup dijon mustard
1/4 cup Worchestershire sauce
1 tablespoon kosher salt
1 tablespoon cracked black pepper
1 tablespoon granulated garlic
1 tablespoon onion powder
1 tablespoon smoked paprika

Directions

Step 1.	place a 2 quart pot over medium high heat.
Step 2.	Add all of the ingredients and bring to a burble (gentle boil).
Step 3.	Drop the heat and allow to simmer (about 90 minutes, stirring occasionally)